UNIQUE KADAZAN ENGAGEMENT CULTURE

I witness an engagement of one of my brother’s son yesterday at a nearby village but lost my way as we were the last to depart from my brother’s house. I was driving with three passengers one of which was my talkative elder sister which I was really mad about her ever non-stop complain. We reached far off the intended house and after a call to my brother’s son did we drove back with my sister still complaining non-stop. She only stopped when I raised my voice to stop her. The house was just by the main road but atop a hill which was unseen from view from the road. We were the last to reach the bride-to be residence.

It was really a hot Saturday afternoon amidst the smooth flow of the discussion of the engagement of which was already discussed earlier by the family. It was the process of signing the documents by the intending couple, witnesses and the confirmation signatory of the village chief and followed by lunch and drinks.

Of all the many engagement that I witnessed, I was unaware of the traditional culture of my people (Kadazan) that the number of representatives assign for the discussion is between five to seven persons (odd number). It was indeed a culture shock to me as the number of people from our side was far exceeded to thirty people. Actually it is not practiced anymore as even now the number of people coming for the engagement is only for the merry making and having great food catered by the host.

There was one engagement postponed to a later date after the intending groom forgets to bring the engagement rings. The bride’s to be family rejected the engagement proposal after the slipped-up. They proposed for another date for the engagement. The prepared food was not wasted as it was taken without the engagement discussion being held. So any intending person (Kadazan) for his engagement must be wise enough not to forget the engagement ring or you will find yourself rejected to marry your girlfriend.

LEARNING ENGLISH THROUGH MISTAKES

One way to improve our English is through advertising where readers will post it and in no time it will be seen by many people and maybe us the author. There are few examples here courtesy of Engrish.com.

What about a dish cooked from the ass of an animal? I would like to know how it tasted.

That's how we expressed ourself when we are angered by the presence of 'Along' aka (illegal creditors) here in our country Malaysia.

This cream should be given free especially to rapist where in the event of being overly aroused they should apply cream.

Guess this one is for Egyptian only!

EMERGENCY – RED ALERT

Remember at any time you really need the toilet but you cannot find one and in desperation any place that can hide you from view will do. I remember at one time when I was at that situation where I desperately needed a toilet after managing to hold it. I dashed to a toilet, which was much better than the one in the picture (at least it was covered and nobody can see you) but as soon as I tried to remove my trouser, it came out like a tsunami. I tried to hold it but somehow some landed on my trouser. Luckily it was already dark and home was just a mere distant away.

Apa Kau rasa .... Oren!!!

When you are in desperation about what was experienced by the lady, you will not in any way care about anything at that time. I would like to share with you about a friend when I was attending a course in Kuching few years back. We were in a bus going back to our hostel when a friend abruptly stop a bus and descended from it and ran to the nearest shop. We were all concerned about him due to the fact that we were all new to Kuching then but since the bus moved on then we just prayed that he would be back before dark.

It was then later that he told us about him needing a toilet but the worst thing that happened to him was that there was no toilet paper or water to cleaned himself. What he did was to take a one ringgit bill and used it just to remove whatever a one ringgit bill could clean. He had thought of using his underwear but thinking of the newly bought branded underwear, he instead used a ringgit bill. He later informed us that he washed the bill and used it for his bus fare.

Next time when you are traveling and you feel like your stomach giving you trouble, make sure you visit your pharmacy or doctor for medical check-up or some medicine to bring. It is better to be well prepared rather than to embarrass you in public.